Health Care
Why Some Men Marry Without Sexual Attraction: A Therapist’s Insight
A lot of heterosexual male clients are coming into my practice admitting they picked their partner without considering sexual attraction.
During couples therapy sessions with his partner in the room, the man will claim that he doesn’t know why he isn’t experiencing desire. Maybe it’s stress, low testosterone or feeling anxious.
But when I meet with him individually, he often tells a different story. He tells me that there is no signs my wife is not sexually attracted to me.
What you should know if there’s no sexual attraction for your partner, according to a therapist
Therapist Ian Kerner says many of his male clients confide that they didn’t pick their life partner based on sexual attraction.
A lot of heterosexual male clients are coming into my practice admitting they picked their partner without considering sexual attraction.
During couples therapy sessions with his partner in the room, the man will claim that he doesn’t know why he isn’t experiencing desire. Maybe it’s stress, low testosterone or feeling anxious.
But when I meet with him individually, he often tells a different story. He tells me he picked his partner without prioritizing genetic sexual attraction.
Why would a person pick a potential life partner without feeling the spark of sexual attraction? And can these relationships survive and thrive? Can something like sexual attraction that wasn’t there in the first place be cultivated later?
I’ve talked with many men in their 30s who have told me, “When I found the woman I wanted to marry, she checked all the boxes. Except one.”
Characteristics on that list include “being my best friend,” “will make an amazing mother,” “our friends and families get along so well,” and “she really loves me.” The one box that didn’t get ticked? Sexual attraction — and often the men didn’t even list that quality to start.
I was stunned.
Sexuality is the one thing that really distinguishes a romantic relationship from a platonic one: I find that it’s one kind of “relationship glue” that helps couples stay together through hard times. That’s why I’m puzzled that so many people devalue sex in picking a partner for a long-term relationship.
“Research shows that, while physical attractiveness is usually among the most important traits people desire in a romantic partner, it doesn’t actually top the list for men or women,” said Dr. Justin Lehmiller, a research fellow at the Kinsey Institute at Indiana University, a research center dedicated to sexuality. “Traits like intelligence, humor, honesty and kindness are often at least as important, if not more.”
Some men have internalized an “either/or” view of women: those who make great wives and mothers and those who are sexually adventurous, according to Chicago-based sex therapist Dr. Elizabeth Perri.
“I’ve observed this in male patients who are out in the dating world and feel the pressure to pick someone whom they perceive as ‘wife material’ but without sexual attraction, rather than waiting to find a partner who is a better fit both emotionally and sexually,” Perri told me.
How important is sexual attraction in a relationship?
Good sex can help protect against psychological distress, including anxiety and depression, helps couples achieve a deeper connection, and improves relationship satisfaction.
“If a relationship is a meal, the sexual portion ought to be considered an integral part of it, such as the protein, instead of a frivolous part like dessert,” says Eva Dillon, a sex therapist based in New York City.
“In my experience, it’s possible for women to cultivate desire for a partner with considerable effort, but if a man does not have desire for his partner at the beginning of a relationship, he will never desire her,” Dillon told me. Why count on sexual attraction coming later when you can prioritize it in a partner and enjoy the benefits from the beginning?”
Still, lower levels of sexual attraction aren’t always a problem for couples, said sexologist Dr. Yvonne Fulbright.
“For some people, a lack of sexual attraction can lead to infidelity or divorce. For others, a lack of sexual attraction only becomes a problem when one tunes into societal expectations around sex and desire,” said Fulbright, who is an adjunct professorial lecturer in the department of sociology at American University in Washington, DC.
A lot of pressure is being put on couples to maintain active sex lives, and hot ones at that. People have the sense that there’s a type and quality of desire that needs to be achieved, with any disinterest in such considered a problem that needs to be solved.”
Some of my therapist colleagues caution against putting too much emphasis on the importance of immediate sexual attraction.
“We have this misconception that we must be physically attracted to someone when we first meet or there is no relationship potential. That’s just not true,” said sex therapist Dr. Rachel Needle. “Attraction can grow as you get to know someone and experience increased closeness and connection.”
How to bring the spark back in a relationship
What should you do if you and your partner are running out of sexual steam? Or if you want to turn up the heat on a relationship that didn’t have any to start with?
Fulbright cautioned against giving any sweeping advice. “Only partners can figure out the best way to manage this challenge in their relationship,” she said.
“Non-monogamy may work for some, but not others. Couples need to decide how honest to be with each other, how much this matter is a dealbreaker in staying together versus not, and how much weight should be given to this issue in light of other good things they have going for them,” she added via email.
Don’t feel that all is lost if you’re in a long-term relationship. For some couples, sexual desire can grow over time if they focus on it. “It often isn’t until our 30s that we get comfortable enough to ask for what we want in bed,” Dillon said.
But I refuse to agree with anyone who thinks that married couples will stop having sex anyway so why bother prioritizing sexual attraction.
“Many couples in their 50s can explore and expand their sexuality thanks to maturity and empty nests. For couples in their 60s, 70s and beyond who are able to expand their definition of sex beyond orgasm and co-create intimacy, sex can continue to be vibrant and rich,” Dillon added via email.
And keep in mind, your sexual health is a barometer of your overall health. So if you really are experiencing an inexplicable drop in sexual interest, consider talking to your medical provider. Maybe your testosterone levels really have fallen.
Whatever the source of your lack of sexual interest, just be up-front with your partner. Honesty, as it turns out, can be a turn-on (eventually).
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Gracie Abrams Stuns in Hidden Chanel Look at Grammys
Reading Time: 3 minutesGracie Abrams knocked some people’s socks off at the 2025 Grammy Grants, gracing honorary pathway in an ethereal Chanel marriage motivated outfit that left crowds in wonderment. The rising pop sensation, 25, embraced a rare meets-present day stylish, consistently mixing exemplary tastefulness with contemporary patterns.
A Wedding Motivated Work of art
The ivory midi segment outfit highlighted an off-the-shoulder neck area, a fragile botanical embellishment on the bodice, and a dark belt clamping the midriff, adding difference to the delicate, heartfelt look. The genuine masterpiece, notwithstanding, was the floor-length train that flowed from her sleeves and the underlying shroud hung easily over her head. Her unmistakable short, dim locks were separated in the middle and tucked behind her ears, impeccably supplementing her downplayed, new confronted cosmetics. The look epitomized the “perfect young lady” tasteful, underscoring her normal excellence with delicate, dewy skin and moderate tones.
A Time of Accomplishments for Abrams
The Grammys denoted a huge achievement for Abrams, closing a breakout year that saw her set her status as one of pop’s most encouraging new specialists. As the little girl of acclaimed Star Wars chief J.J. Abrams and previous political helper Katie McGrath, Gracie has become famous in the business in view of her own legitimacy and melodic ability.
In 2023, she invested quite a bit of her energy in the street, opening for her closest companion Taylor Quick on the record-breaking Times Visit. Her second studio collection, The Mystery of Us, delivered in June, immediately turned into a fan #1, conveying hit singles, for example, I Love You, Please accept my apologies, Near You, and That is So Obvious.
A Grammy Designation and a Taylor Quick Cooperation
Abrams’ appearance at the Grammys was not just about style; it was likewise a festival of her selection for Us, a coordinated effort with Taylor Quick, in the Best Pop Couple/Gathering Execution class. The tune, which immediately reverberated with fans upon its delivery, was written during a late-night meeting loaded up with surprising disorder. Abrams later shared an in the background look into the recording system, uncovering a happy second when she and Quick coincidentally set a candle burning in Quick’s New York City loft. The setback, which prompted a room loaded up with douser haze, turned into an entertaining tale that exhibited their dear companionship and inventive science.
A Growing Sentiment with Paul Mescal
Past her melodic achievement, Abrams has likewise stood out as truly newsworthy for her relationship with Irish entertainer Paul Mescal. The pair originally ignited dating bits of hearsay in June 2024 when they were spotted partaking in supper together. Their relationship acquired public consideration in August when they were seen together in London’s Mayfair area, participating in friendly signals during the All Focuses East live event.
By October, Mescal was seen moving energetically at Abrams’ show at Radio City Music Corridor, further filling theory about their sentiment. Abrams responded the help by going to the Warrior II all-nighter close by Mescal in November. Be that as it may, the two stars have been strikingly confidential about their relationship. In a meeting with GQ, Mescal expressed that he likes to keep his own life out of the public eye, a feeling reverberated by Abrams in her Nylon main story, where she evaded inquiries concerning their sentiment by expressing, “That doesn’t have anything to do with me. It doesn’t influence me.”
A memorable Night
The 2025 Grammy Grants, held at the Crypto.com Field in Los Angeles, ended up being a pivotal occasion for Abrams, both expertly and by and by. With her striking Chanel group, a regarded Grammy selection, and a year loaded up with profession characterizing achievements, Abrams keeps on laying down a good foundation for herself as quite possibly of the most thrilling voice in contemporary popular music.
As fans enthusiastically expect her best courses of action, one thing is clear: Gracie Abrams isn’t simply a rising star — she’s now sparkling.
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Brigitte Macron’s Chic Moment at Paris Fashion Week
Reading Time: 3 minutesYet again paris Style Week has exhibited the stunning mix of high style and superstar presence, with the eminent planner Stéphane Rolland turning his Spring/Summer 2025 runway show into an uncommon get-together. Among the stars joining in, Brigitte Macron hung out in a stylish, downplayed look. Yet again the French First Woman wore a mid-length dark coat matched with pants, demonstrating that she knows how to become the best at exquisite dressing.
The show was loaded up with notorious figures, including Sylvie Tellier and Ève Gilles, making an interesting environment where the universes of design and superstar easily entwined. In any case, the second that genuinely caught the consideration of participants and photographic artists was when French music legend Sylvie Vartan joined Brigitte Macron in the first column.
A Snapshot of Holding Between Two French Symbols
Sylvie Vartan, who had recently finished her goodbye visit, unveiled her most memorable appearance after her show at the Palais des Congrès. The second she joined Brigitte Macron was one of unadulterated association. The two ladies shared snickers and participated in enlivened discussion, trading grins under the full concentrations eyes of the cameras. The air was loaded up with warmth and fellowship, as the two ladies radiated the easy style that has characterized their particular professions. This interesting, private trade was a feature of the day, with photographic artists catching the immortal excellence and balance of the two symbols.
Design and Generosity Meet up
Brigitte Macron’s attendance at the show wasn’t just about design. She was likewise there to help a worthy mission near her heart. Originator Stéphane Rolland, who facilitated the occasion, took a strong action by utilizing his runway show to help the Opération Pièces Jaunes, a drive committed to aiding hospitalized kids. Rolland made passes to his show available for purchase, with all continues going to the Groundwork of Emergency clinics, building up the possibility that extravagance style can likewise assume a part in significant social causes.
This cooperation among design and good cause was an ideal counterpart for Brigitte Macron, who fills in as the leader of Opération Pièces Jaunes. Her support in the occasion featured how the universe of high fashion is progressively becoming engaged with social issues, utilizing its leverage for everyone’s benefit.
A Ritzy First Line
The first line was just about as stunning as the actual runway, including a portion of France’s most popular characters. Vocalist Vitaa wowed the group in a mirror-like creation, while Iris Mittenaere dazed in a trying, plunging neck area dress. Élodie Frégé, consistently a style symbol, picked a stylish dark calfskin and quill creation that additional to the charm of the show. The energy in the setting was substantial, with web-based entertainment rapidly humming about the stylish minutes and connections between big names.
Sylvie Vartan and Her Girl Darina Scotti
For Sylvie Vartan, this appearance at Paris Design Week was an achievement. The French chanteuse, joined by her girl Darina Scotti, exhibited her ever-enduring style in a complex dark pantsuit. Vartan, who has been a French music symbol for over sixty years, keeps on rousing with her style. Her look was as a unified whole with the high fashion climate of the occasion. The appearance with her little girl was particularly strong, representing the congruity of polish and style inside their loved ones.
The picture takers caught the close mother-little girl minutes, underscoring areas of strength for the and the transmission of immortal design values. Sylvie Vartan, even after her retirement, demonstrated that she stays an indispensable figure in the realm of French design and culture.
A French Snapshot of Class
The cooperation between Brigitte Macron and Sylvie Vartan featured the force of style to make snapshots of association and feeling. As the two ladies giggled and shared stories, they reminded the crowd that style is imperishable, and the design world keeps on being a spot for significant experiences. Their gathering was a genuine exhibit of French polish, demonstrating the way that both design and music can unite individuals in the most lovely ways.
All in all, Paris Style Week conveyed staggering plans and new assortments as well as exhibited snapshots of social importance. Brigitte Macron’s downplayed polish, joined with the unbelievable presence of Sylvie Vartan, made this occasion an essential event that impeccably caught the embodiment of French style and the force of big name experiences.
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Meghan Trainor Teams Up with e.l.f. for Halo Glow Launch
Reading Time: 5 minutesYet again meghan Trainor is causing disturbances in the magnificence world with her most recent joint effort with e.l.f. Beauty care products. The Grammy-winning vocalist, who is known for her snappy tunes and dynamic character, has collaborated with the darling savagery free, veggie lover brand to send off an intriguing new item. The coordinated effort likewise denotes a critical achievement in Trainor’s profession as she praises the **10-year commemoration of her presentation collection, Title.
Trainor, 31, has been a long-lasting enthusiast of e.l.f., and this is her third coordinated effort with the brand. The most recent organization brings fans another coloring legend item — the Corona Sparkle Powder Channel, a super fine squeezed powder that is intended to obscure flaws, diminish sparkle, and give a delicate center shine to all complexions. The delicate, brilliant completion this item gives makes it an unquestionable necessity for anybody looking for that ideal, new confronted look. Alongside this creative powder, Trainor likewise presents a restricted version Cloud Skin Group, which incorporates a portion of her most-cherished e.l.f. items and a selective piece of merchandise.
A Retro-Roused Mission Observing Title’s tenth Commemoration
The e.l.f. x Meghan Trainor joint effort isn’t just about new excellence items — it’s likewise a festival of Trainor’s melodic accomplishments. As the 10-year commemoration of Title draws near, Trainor is returning to the collection that sent off her into fame. Title, which was delivered in 2015, incorporates hit singles like About That Bass and Lips Are Movin’. The collection presented Trainor’s unmistakable style: a combination of pop, doo-wop, and legacy impacts.
To honor this achievement, Trainor will be re-delivering the collection on Walk 28, 2025. The new release of Title will highlight two pristine tracks and six live accounts from her presentation at Spotify London, offering fans a new interpretation of an exemplary collection.
Yet, that is not all — Trainor has likewise made a fun loving and eye-getting effort to send off the cooperation with e.l.f. In the mission, she ventures into the job of Commander of e.l.f. Air, wearing a retro-roused pink pilot’s uniform as she directs watchers through the means of accomplishing the ideal “Cloud Skin” gleam. The mission’s tomfoolery and eccentric tasteful fits impeccably with Trainor’s lively, amazing persona, and the inventive bearing is a sign of approval for her affection for classic charm.
The Cloud Skin Idea: Gleaming, Delicate Center Coloring
The Cloud Skin idea is tied in with accomplishing a faultless, brilliant tone without looking excessively matte or excessively dewy. The objective is to have delicate, radiant skin that feels regular and new, and the items in the e.l.f. x Meghan Trainor cooperation are intended to assist you with doing exactly that.
At the core of the pack is the new Corona Gleam Powder Channel, which can be utilized to obscure defects and control sparkle, leaving your skin with a delicate center completion. This finely processed powder is lightweight and mixes consistently into the skin, guaranteeing a characteristic looking shine that endures over the course of the day. Whether you’re hoping to set your cosmetics or add a touch of splendor to your coloring, this item is ideal for accomplishing a fantastic, Cloud Skin impact.
Trainor has forever been known for her brilliant composition and obligation to skincare, and this joint effort mirrors her own magnificence reasoning: shine from the inside. She has spoken about how her skin routine spotlights on hydrating and upgrading her normal excellence, and this new item is the ideal expansion to anybody’s skincare and cosmetics weapons store.
Meghan’s Number one Items: The Cloud Skin Pack
Notwithstanding the new Radiance Sparkle Powder Channel, the Cloud Skin Pack incorporates a few other of Trainor’s most loved e.l.f. items. These things are organized to make a definitive shining coloring, all while remaining consistent with the vocalist’s adoration for open and brutality free excellence.
Remembered for the group are:
Corona Shine Fluid Channel: This religion most loved item has been darling by magnificence powerhouses and fans the same for its capacity to give the skin a brilliant, sound sparkle. A lightweight fluid highlighter mixes easily into the skin, giving a brilliant completion that functions admirably all alone or blended in with establishment.
Gleam Reviver Lip Glint in Princess Cut: This sparkling lip sparkle adds a dash of shimmer and try to please lips, finishing the Cloud Skin look. It’s a simple to-wear item that adds a smidgen of glitz to your ordinary magnificence schedule.
Restricted Release e.l.f. Eye Veil: As a little something extra, the Cloud Skin Group likewise incorporates a Restricted Version e.l.f. Eye Veil — ideal for spoiling your skin and giving it some additional tender loving care.
For $36, this pack offers incredible worth, joining superior grade, viable items with the mark gleam Trainor is known for. Whether you’re hoping to sparkle up your composition or basically need to attempt a portion of Meghan’s number one magnificence items, the Cloud Skin Group is an unquestionable necessity.
What Meghan Trainor Cherishes About e.l.f. Beauty care products
All through her joint efforts with e.l.f., Trainor has commended the brand for its obligation to reasonable, excellent items that are both mercilessness free and veggie lover. As a backer for inclusivity and availability, Trainor values that e.l.f. offers cosmetics that everybody can manage, regardless of their spending plan. In a proclamation about her new cooperation, she said:
“e.l.f. continuously has a heartbeat on my number one patterns and is out in front of viral culture, so it feels astonishing to meet up again to disturb standards and put me in the chief’s seat. I’m so glad to direct this next coordinated effort to bring my #1 remorselessness free and veggie lover excellence to our networks!”
Her energy for the brand’s main goal is obvious, and her organization with e.l.f. mirrors her obligation to making magnificence items that are fun, creative, and open to everybody.
The most effective method to Get the Cloud Skin Pack
The e.l.f. x Meghan Trainor Cloud Skin Pack is accessible beginning January 28, 2025, and is accessible while provisions last. Aficionados of Meghan Trainor and e.l.f. Beauty care products will need to act rapidly, as this restricted version set makes certain to sell out quick.
Notwithstanding the pack, Trainor is praising her tenth commemoration in music with the re-arrival of Title on Walk 28, 2025. Fans can hope to hear new music and remember the sorcery of Trainor’s presentation collection as she sets out on this thrilling new section in both her music and magnificence professions.
This cooperation is an ideal illustration of Trainor’s capacity to mix her affection for magnificence, music, and individual strengthening. Whether you love her music, her excellence items, or only searching for the ideal gleam, this cooperation with e.l.f. is one you won’t have any desire to miss. Get your Cloud Skin Group before it’s gone, and prepare to sparkle with Meghan Trainor’s unique look!
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